How Can They?

It has been too long.
Too long since I have blogged, yet it has not been far from my mind. God has blessed our little family with so much possibility and though much is still unknown or set in stone, it is all too exciting to not share! Alas, this is not the time nor the post to do so. Let that suspense lead you into prayer for our family and ministry Cwtrials.

In reading through Romans 10 today during my precious almost-two-years-old nap time, I was bursting with joy and "amens"! With all that I have strategically planned for blogging, to begin next month, THIS could NOT wait. It is His word that interrupts my grace-filled life, and that I will not hinder.

Let me just whisper to you some of the history behind this and why my heart is so struck-
ever since I was a young girl, the Lord has impressed upon my heart a passion for missions. I married a man who loves the Lord and together we desperately seek to see Him glorified through our lives, our family, our ministry. We just celebrated a beautiful weekend with a friend who poured into us hope and truth and vision for our unique ministry. He's been where we are and God has brought him to a point now where he can humbly pour into our lives from the wisdom he has received. What a blessed time we are still processing through!

My prayer, written out on a piece of paper and again in my journal goes like this "My hearts desire and prayer to God for the (Turkish, Albanian, Greek, Zimbabwean, New Englanders, Napali) is that they may be saved!" It is Romans 10:1 and when I skimmed this first verse yesterday, I was stunned to see Paul's letter to the Romans, praying for the Israelites, to be MY very prayer for these people groups (listed in no particular order).

It later goes on to say in verse 14 &15, "How, then, can they call on the one they have not believed in? And how can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard? And how can they hear without someone preaching to them? And how can they preach unless they are sent? As it is written, 'How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news?'" (inside quote from Isaiah 52:7)

How can they?...call on the one they have not believed in, if they have not heard, if nobody has preached it to them? How can they preach unless they are sent? "Faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word of Christ." (Romans 10:17)

Don't get the wrong idea, dismiss that picture in your mind of stoic missionaries to foreign lands, dressed and living as if they never left the US, not willing to get down in the dirt and work with the people they are among, or standing on soap boxes with bullhorns preaching only condemnation.
That is not the Gospel. That is NOT the example Christ set for us, His humble life displayed throughout scripture, befriending the adulteress and washing the dirty feet of His companions... a job meant for the "lowly".

The fact is, the truth screaming here and now even in 2012 with all of the technology at our fingertips if you are reading this... There are still people in our world, in our own country that have never heard the Gospel message, never seen a "little-Jesus" in action. How can they believe if they have never heard?

We don't need to travel to foreign lands or live among the Refugees and immigrants here in America to preach the gospel to ears that have never heard. The question is, if you are a follower of Christ, are you ready and willing to share it? Are you reading the Bible to "know your stuff", are you praying, pleading on behalf of those around you, are you living it out in your everyday life and not just at church or among certain people? Truth is, do you believe the Gospel message for yourself? That Christ came and died to give you new life. For you.

Go ahead and sing the song "Jesus loves me this I know..." But do you know that even if it was just YOU He was dying for, He would have still died. It is so easy to be caught up in "Jesus died for everyone" and follow that in our heads by telling ourselves lies that we aren't good enough. Honestly, there isn't anything you could ever do to make Him love you more, or love you any less. He loves you.

I say this all because I am learning to embrace this for myself. I'm not who I was 3-4 years ago. I was so eager to share the Gospel, but I wasn't believing its truth for myself and when those Christians weren't around I sure wasn't acting like it either.

Learning to live in God's grace, accepting it and believing it is the first step to living a life of freedom. It is where the road to living a Gospel-filled life begins, enabling you to truly live and giving you the tools to share the Truth of our Life Giver. Embracing the message of Christ, through His word, equipping us to preach it "so that there may be righteousness for everyone who believes." (Romans 10:4)

My Rock

I am not the perfect wife.

Nor the perfect mother. Or sister, or daughter, or friend, or Christian. 

I stopped striving to be the "perfect _____"

It's so exhausting to constantly be focusing on ME all the time, how I can be better, do better, who is doing it better and how I need to be like them.

I do have a role model in the Proverbs 31 woman. 

She takes care of others. She cares for her FAMILY and for the seamingly lowly people.

Her husband calls her blessed and HE himself is respected by people.

I have this life-partner. A BEST friend. Someone I can confide in, laugh with, cry with, PRAY with and enjoy playing with our kids. He is my greatest encourager. He is my husband. My very own knight in shining armor.

I think about him all day, every day and I truly miss him when he is at work and jokingly say he could never work from home because I would just want to spend time with him ALL DAY.

I loooooove him. (sometimes I don't like him, but even then I choose to love him.... but about 99% of the time I REALLY like him!) 

I don't have it all together and he sees that. Maybe even better than I can see it myself.

Can I be honest? I do try to maintain the house during the day but I often let the dishes pile up. About 15 mins before he gets home I run over to that sink and clean them all up in a flash! (...most of the time...) that is my "I feel like I actually got something done today", even if I did vacuum, sweep and do 3 loads of laundry- but you would never guess because of the crumbs on the floor and giant pile of laundry. 

I am blessed to have a man who loves me so well because he understands Christ's love. He doesn't put me down and say "what did you do all day" when the house is spilling with toys and crumbs.

I am a Momma who would rather be on the floor, making a mess of those toys with the kids than yelling at them or stressing to constantly be cleaning up everything behind them.All.Day.Long. 

But my kids aren't my main priority. Don't get me wrong! They ARE my priority and I strive to live each day intentionally loving them and raising them up in Christ's love. But my husband is my other priority. THE main priority. As in, he comes (our relationship) BEFORE our kids. Or our jobs. Or our ministry. Or our church. Or our friends. Or our To-Do list.
I want my husband to know and feel SO loved! SO encouraged. I want him to be as eager to come home as we are for him to come home. I want our home to be a place of peace (as much as I can control it) so that when he walks in that door our world stops and we cheer that Daddy is home!! 

 

We are some of the silliest people I know!

Ugh, what a blessing!? I don't take this man for granted. Not.One.Bit. I adore him. I LOOOOVE HIM. I respect him and I encourage him. I am his #1 fan and I will fight for him. I do battle for him. Every day- in prayer. And we have gone through a lot in our 2 years of marriage. We have struggled, battled financial hardships, health issues, depression, BIG fears, broken pasts and the list goes on. We are messy sinners who have to be washed clean DAILY by Jesus. I can promise you that our marriage wouldn't be like this if we didn't both love Jesus.

Can I emphasis that we DON'T have it all together? Each day is new, and we love each other. We play on the same team, working together, building each other up and learning how to do this thing called life together. We find new hope each day in Christ, spending time in His Word and in prayer. Being committed to our Lord enables us to be more committed to each other.
Craig, I love you.

Proverbs 31 Woman

    Let me first start out by sharing with you that I have poured over Proverbs 31 more than any other passage of scripture. From the time I was a small child, one of the youngest activists at a Pro-Life rally, verse 9 has resonated in my being- “Speak up and judge fairly; defend the rights of the poor and needy.” I always shout it in my head with exclamation points as I have taken hold of his scripture for how I will live my life!
    So often we hear of a popular part of scripture and just read that part. I like to read what is said around that, which isn’t enclosed in the “Must Read!” section. This verse is interestingly placed just before the Wife of Noble Character subtitle in my Bible. I include it in my reading and find so much in the following verses that are examples of this command of how to treat the poor and destitute; from how this woman treats her servant girls to how she provides for her family to ensure that they will be fed and clothed.
    All throughout this section in my Bible, I have underlined and emphasized key words that are examples of how I should not only live, but what should be ingrained in my character. You can’t simply look at my life and see that I am thrifty, provide healthy foods for my family and conserve not only for this beautiful earth God has given us to live on and being mindful to make the most of every dollar and hour the Lord has blessed me with. Everything must be intentional. I don’t wake up every day thinking, “I must find the cheapest and easiest way to do my things.” Rather I pray, “Lord equip me to use all you have blessed me with to be a blessing to you and those around me.” I believe with all of my heart that God calls each and every one of us to use our moments in the day and the money (no matter how much or how little) to praise God, to bless others, and to be spent so very wisely and intentionally.
    Throughout this scripture I have pulled words and phrases to come to my mind throughout the day as a way of accountability and reminders of why I am doing what I am doing, or most importantly, most every day- what I need to be doing and why; not just to be done, but to be done with the right heart.
    These are some of those phrases and words that have been the motivation for my way of life. Vs. 13 “works with eager hands” vs. 15 “provides food for her family” vs. 17 “works vigorously… arms are strong” vs. 20 “opens her arms… extends her hands” vs. 21 “has no fear” vs. 22 & 24 “makes…” vs. 25 “strength and dignity… she can laugh” vs. 26 “speaks with wisdom… faithful instruction on her tongue” vs. 27 “does not… idle” vs. 28&29 “her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: ‘Many women do noble things but you surpass them all.’” vs. 30 “a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised”
    These are my reasons for living my life the way I choose to. This woman whom I have never met is my role model, my mentor, on how to live of “Noble Character.”

Time + Money

I was recently talking to a friend who is considering cloth diapering. People were discouraging her saying that it is too time consuming, messy, you don't actually save money because of start up costs and the washing process.

WRONG

From my experience cloth diapering. Making food from scratch. Making laundry & dishwasher soap from scratch. Making home made cleaning products. My oh my, the money we have saved. It pays to put a little elbow grease and carve out some time to do it home-made. Most of the time anyway.


I was recently asked to share my "money saving tips" with another stay at home Mom. I wrote up my list. Several pages later... She told me that I should blog about it. I thought blogging was weird. People just write on the internet for the whole world to see? They share their thoughts and lives with people they don't even know? Weird. Maybe you think so to. Yet, here you are. And here I am. Writing a blog. I have been inspired by two blogs that I follow and have peeked at a few others via their suggestions.


So here it goes. Not my effort to blog in general. But to blog with purpose. I actually wrote up a list in my personal journal of "goals" I have with my blog. Here is a little looksie at what I hope to write about:
- Our family and ministry. (www.cwtrials.com)
- My passions (too many to list write now)
- How we choose to live intentionally (we are talking about MONEY here. Resources. Food. Clothing. Etc.)
- Recipes and ideas of what I make from scratch/ repurpose.
- And to tie it all up and the #1 reason why we do what we do- our love for Jesus and passion for sharing the Gospel by living it out in EVERY area of our lives. This is a daily, moment to moment effort. And we fail a lot of times. But this is about the hope we have found in Christ.

I am working on the whole posting pictures thing. I really would love to have a pic or two to go with what I write about. We recently got a Mac (awesome story behind that!) and I am still learning it. My camera is dying... and not just the battery here. We have poor internet connection. So, I'm working on it. Hang tight. I promise to put some serious effort into this rather difficult task for me.