I Know You...

There is this moment, right now, where I am sitting not too far from a girl who I recognize and realize, "Hey! Your family member recently helped Cwtrials in a big way... but I don't think you know who I am."

There is this moment, I run into it a lot around Manchester, when I see someone and think "Hey! I know who you are!" But I doubt they know me. It isn't an awkward stalker thing, I just have an elephant of a memory when it comes to faces... and it can be a little creepy. (I don't mean to be creepy)

A while ago now, we had a celebrity-type moment at Starbucks. Some young girls excitedly came up to Craig and I and recognized us from a Cwtrials event. Craig was "the guy who did cool bike things at youth group."

Another time, not too long ago, our neighbors brother came over to say hi while we were outside. He recognized us from a Cwtrials event a few towns over... from several months ago. He repeated everything he knew about us from our conversation after the event.

I read a blog once about "how to deal with being famous." The title/ topic sounded pretty arrogant to me. I'm not saying this in the next breath after talking about being recognized because we are famous. These encounters (ahem, including the girl sitting not too far from me right now) are reminders that I have influence, I am being watched. Especially when you slap a "Missionary" tag on me and here I am surrounded by all the friends, family and culture I have known my whole life. (aka all the people who have seen me fail in big and little ways over the years and the people who without-meaning-to watch/ judge me for what I am/not doing.)

These past 7 weeks have been a bit chaotic in our life, filled with many BIG life happenings. (To catch up, read here and here) This past week, we spent 4 days moving out of the place we called home for 2 1/2 years "in the city", to living at my parents house during this transition period while we wait to close on our house "in the country." I sometimes think I like change, but really I'm super awkward at handling it. This has been that week.

awkwardness evidence. 

In the midst of all our "personal" life happenings, we were (are) support raising and doing 7 Cwtrials events in 5 weeks. This has been an anticipated season for us. But really, no matter how much you prepare for something, the fatigue and emotions of it all sometimes just HIT YOU in the face. This has been my week. And this weekend we have a Cwtrials event that I have been most looking forward to and anticipating all summer. So today is my "girl, get yourself together, go out have your moment of time to get your head on, get prettied up, do something fun- ALONE" because one week is enough. Our world doesn't stop. I don't stop being a Wife, a Mom, an-every-other-label. I don't want to just get by day-to-day. I want to excel in those areas more than on the weekends.

And this isn't all for show. I want each day to be a moment when I am full so I can pour out, so my eyes can peer beyond me and this moment so I can pour out Christ. To pour Him out I need to be living in Him, to be refreshed by Him. Not just daily, but moment by moment. And man, it's not easy. So pray for me sometime okay? I want to be more eager to pray for others, to pray with others and lately, I'm just not.